


DBH Miscellaneous AUs from Twitter

by thebetterbina



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, Twitter, reposted threads from my twitter account
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:00:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 7,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26263819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebetterbina/pseuds/thebetterbina
Summary: Rated E just to be cautious, each chapter is a different rating. Specific AU focus will be in the chapter title. Some chapters will focus on the ship between Hank and Connor (platonic as well as romantic), some will include other characters.Decided to repost my Twitter threads from my account@therealconnor60, had a number of them and hiding them away on Google Docs felt like such a waste. Enjoy!
Relationships: 60/900, Hank Anderson & Connor, Hank Anderson/Connor
Comments: 10
Kudos: 10





	1. Purge AU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Blessed be our New Founding Fathers and America, a nation reborn." because the movies, while shitty, gives a pretty cool concept for us chaotic fuckers

PURGE AU: while most Android's are equiped with purge protocols (ie. protect their registered owners against other attackers) these Android's aren't meant to handle large mobs CyberLife's response to growing attacks on their stores: the Connor models

The Connor models are almost exclusively the only line of Android's meant/made for a single objective task: get through the purge night CyberLife uses the models to protect their warehouses and stores during this time, one model alone can easily handle and take down groups of 10

People just learn very quickly not to come near to these Android's but for the most part as long as you don't bother a Connor model, he doesn't bother you and makes for good protection as long as you don't antagonize it's mission

Connor models being bought by big businesses, and maybe if you're rich enough to afford one - as a personal bodyguard Connor models being made much sturdier than normal Android models and equipped with very vast knowledge of weapon usage

* * *

Desperately looking for that old Purge AU I had because I got more to add

Okay I don't care I'm typing out some ideas - basically Hank spends the purge at the DPD, supposedly safer than his own home because they really buffed the security up and officers become allowed to bring their families in for safety so Hank does that with Cole

Only it goes wrong because someone - maybe out of anger or jealousy decides to hold Cole at gunpoint and escapes the DPD with the little boy and Hank is absolutely loosing his shit and desperate to get his boy back so he tracks the fucker

And the situation goes to shit when a bunch of actually crazy purgers turn up and Hank thinks the situation can't get any worse until shots ring out, steady intervals silencing the screaming voices and Hank could never be worse, he's thinking the worst possible outcome occurred

And he just rushes out the corner gun ready to shoot the motherfucker and he's faced with the same and a voice - Cole - alive and well, a little scared but safe screaming "No" at??? An Android?????

And he finally notices the CyberLife store that they were in front of and pieces begin to click and he notices the Android is one of the specialized ones made for CyberLife for the purge time, much more advanced than any of their current Android's and absolutely ruthless

And he watches the Android just lower it's gun, and Cole rushes to him and really that's all that matters to Hank and he just watches the Android watch the scene before walking back to the still pristine CyberLife store and Hank is like??? Are you okay????

And Cole is like!!!!! Yeah!!!! The Android protected me and Hank is like wow??? He thought those things just shot any human that wandered too close but when he actually watches the model it's just idly doing its thing and not raising it's gun at Hank or Cole

Hank just cautiously asking the Android why it didn't shoot Cole or him and the Android curtly replying his directives were to ensure the store remains safe through the night and Hank pointing out the group was well a few feet away from the store and Connor wandered there himself

The Android awkwardly explaining he detected heavy distress from Cole and intervened according to his own directives

* * *

Allen's never liked the purge, too much unnecessary blood spilled and people you know dying just because some neighbor over hated how much you mowed you grass. It gets worse when the law sanctions the death of presidential candidates - suddenly he finds himself working on a day

he'd much rather spend holed, grounded and protected in his own home. But this is his job - and the pay is almost four times considering how potentially dangerous it's going to be. Allen also trusts his men, and he considerably favours the candidate too - a lady advocating for

the annulment of the annual purge. But this year also gets different - CyberLife, the fuckers, went off and made an all exclusive Android line specifically made for the purge. The Connor models, innocent looking killing machines he'd seen during their testing phases - monsters

that could take down half his men without so much as taking damage. It was a little infuriating - knowing how easily jobs were being taken over by androids simply because CyberLife could make them be that way. (Normal Android's had their Purge protocols - but Connor's were

practically designed to handle mobs and protect their charges with vice.) This one is no different - glary finicky thing that never strayed too far from the candidate. CyberLife had been "gracious" enough to offer all the presidential candidates Connor models - a move on their

part to show neutrality. Any normal person wouldn't hesitate to accept, he knows those models are a small fortune to make and an average household couldn't even dream of owning one for themselves.

This particular model, named "Silas" because of course the candidate just happens to also be an advocate for Android Rights after the revolution - seriously, this whole country is a mess - is snappy the entire time. Glaring with a hold on the security systems and never leaving

more than 2 meters away from the lady. Allen would never admit it - but it's a little comforting for his constantly frazzled nerves. There's no lie on just how much the purge took a toll on even the best of people and knowing there's one unfaltering constant is comforting.

It's fine all up until it isn't. He should've expected it really, there's a part of trusting another human that's never settled considering the cases he's seen. This time it's greed, someone with a bigger pocket who'd offered up a nice big price for the candidate's head.

The safe house goes to shit. There's gunshots and a number of his men - good men goddammit - going down without a chance to fire back. The only other who keeps going at it is Silas, who keeps firing round after round and switching weapons from the dead like some carousel of death

They make their way out barly scraping by. The candidate is shaken up - but safe. He got out with some grazes, Silas - there's some blue stuff dripping out of the Androids arm but he seems entirely unbothered. Relaying layering options to camp out until the purge finishes.

* * *

Also I'm horrible I've been denying y'all some dbh au so have a taste tease: HUMAN!PURGE!AU where Connor and Jericho gang are elite uni valedictorian students most of the year and turn into batshit crazy purgers on the night itself

There's Markus, the group leader, Valedictorian of his year with a shiny career as a politician all paved out nicely. He paints as a hobby, goes to orphanages and spends time with the kids there, fingerpainting on empty walls - his community absolutely adores him.

There's North, his right hand and staunch advocate of women's rights and a fierce LGBTQ+ supporter. Her social media fans adore their lesbian jesus, bordering cult like. Doesn't hesitate to throw the first punch if agitated, most people know not to cross her.

There's Josh, the peace advocate, a long time participant in model united nations (always holding his own in the toughest council, the United Nations Security Council) with a track record setting him up easily with the global organisation.

There's Simon, the mediator, always the one with the soft voice and pacifying personality. Able to quell even the worse of tempers and play emotions with a terrifying degree of effectiveness. People whisper how he's already on the track of being Markus's campaign manager.

Finally there's Connor - although to most he's a loose canon. Just as brilliant as Markus but business oriented, he'd set up Detroit's first junior enterprise and runs the business with a finesse that's characteristic of a seasoned entrepreneur. He runs it with his brothers.

On Purge Night they're the most feared group, a switch comes flipped and a bolt goes unscrewed.


	2. 60/900

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> look this is my new ship don't shame me

Please consider: 60/900

Don't get me wrong Reed900 is still great, but while Gavin gets weak at the knees when 900 rears up and goes to choke him with 60 it's just

900: I calculated nine different ways to pull your Thirium pump out

60: and you don't think I haven't, bitch?

* * *

60 that one(1) slut who fights BACK and don't tell me 900 doesn't get off on it

* * *

900, choking 60 out: submit

60, teeth bared, clawing @ 900 and still glaring: id rather be fucking deactivated

900, internally, recalling how easily Gavin had gone limp in this hold and being overall confused at this new reaction: ?????????

* * *

I really didn't expect this to be received so nicely so guess what y'all are gETTING A THREAD HAFJDKNX When the revolution succeeded and CyberLife was forced to relinquish hold on the remaining androids, it's really no surprise 900 gets offered to join the DPD.

There aren't many models like him and Connor around, not many hard wired for the detective work they were built for - with crimes seeing a brief spike of freshly deviated androids and anti-android sentiment from humans he also shouldn't be surprised when 60 joins.

The rest of the Connor models are activated of course - most having been sent to other precincts to help fill the gap the humans had left after fleeing Detroit with their families. But 60 in particular gets assigned to their precinct because of how uncannily aggressive he is.

Connor, of course of all people Connor, offers to keep an eye out - Markus had thought it'd be a good idea. Have someone 60 could learn from when it's so clear to 900 how much aggression 60 has for him. Androids took to deviancy differently, ranging from calm acceptance to anger.

He tries initiating conversation with 60 of course, he does try - but it's met with the same steadfast and biting remarks Detective Reed is prone to. Of course 900 knows how to deal with Detective Reed, asserting dominance just one of the few things CyberLife thought useful.

What perplexes him is how 60 reacts - rather than buckling and submitting the same way Reed had; 60 fights back, with much more ferocity than he'd anticipated.

They end up causing somewhat of a havoc in the middle of the bullpen, two superior androids going at each other was something straight out of those illegal android fight rings. They break apart when 900 finally manages to pull his Thirium pump out.

He tries not to think too hard on just how /satisfied/ he felt after doing it - admires the way 60 still glares, harshly, filled with righteous anger and still not yielding even when Fowler has to grouse at the both of them to know better and sends them home for the day.

* * *

60/900 James Bond/Spy AU

"That's a change of things."

60 notes rather offhandedly, crossing of lithe legs only hiking the babydoll up further. Exposing pale calf and carefully manicured nails as he motions to the additional set of men inside and outside the master suite.

"What is?"

900 plays clueless, sliding the pistol into the holster, giving side eyed glance over 60.

There's a purr as 60 speaks next, coy smile ready to stroke his ego.

"The three little pigs guarding the big bad wolf."

The smirk 900 responds with is entirely knowing.


	3. Altered Carbon AU

if you haven't seen altered carbon im begging you please give that boy a chance its so good im gonna piss myself and if you arent into netflix then reading the book is also good please dear god its so good im gonna pee lemme just give a rundown before i talk about dbh au

basically set in a world where alien tech allows humans to download their consciousness into these little disks called "stacks" and bodies are just reduced to replaceable "sleeves". you damage a sleeve you get an option to repair it or replace it.

ofc if you keep switching between multiple sleeves you end up going insane, its also entirely possibly to duplicate your stack and make a doppleganger of yourself but its illegal. the only way to maintain your sanity and stay immortal is by cloning your original body but MONEY

the only people able to afford cloning and all the important tech are the ultimate rich aka "meths" where they live above the clouds in their own little rich community called the "aerium" and the rest of the normal folks live down there under the clouds

OKAY SO DBH AU BASICALLY elijah kamski and his wife chloe are the ultimate rich meths of detroit having lived for like 300+ years but no one is really counting elijah is just so filthy rich and they end up having exactly one son - connor who's basically been

forced to stop growing around his early twenties so he looks VERY young and chloe had absentmindedly asked for more children but elijah just decided to outright copy connor's stack and duplicate him twice so connor ends up with his "twin brothers" niles (rk900) and silas (60)

"twin brothers" but really their just his dopplegangers and part of elijahs sick little twisted experiment to see if clones can develop apart from its original body and its super fucked up because the boys end up going through heavy identity crisis anyways

all three of them were forced by elijah to stop aging past their early twenties even though all of their brains are like 100+ years worth of memories its super fucked up because elijah also forced them to look the same and only blithely allowed niles to change his eye color

whats even more fucked up is when elijah creates cole, another doppleganger of connor but forced to remain in his nine year old body when chloe had mentioned she'd loved to have her little boys cute and small again


	4. Guide/Sentinel AU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> that guide / sentinel au i said i fully intended to develop but never got to

Important au: guide/sentinel au!!!! It's not that much of a known trope but it's one I adore simply because the concept is great and you can add whatever you want and it still makes sense and HHHHHHHHH BUT HERE'S THE QUICK SUMMARY:

Sentinels: can have up to one or all five senses fully enhanced. Five fully enhanced senses means the sentinel is fully awakened Sentinels can suffer from "zoning" when the enhanced senses became too much to handle - above 3 enhanced senses, sentinels are required to have a guide

Guides: the defacto pair of any sentinel, guides have the rare ability to connect to sentinels on a deeper level making them some form of empaths. Guides have the ability to lead a sentinel safely out of "zones" - but are equally feared to drive sentinels to deeper "zones"

THE HANKCON AU: PICTURE HANK a kind of washed up sentinel, for the longest time he's kept his awakened senses to just two - hearing and sight - it's helped him well on the job and frankly he doesn't want to deal with being fully awakened and having a full time guide

PICTURE CONNOR who's the epitome of what a good guide is, comes from a background of solid guides and has gone through rigid guide training making him more than qualified to deal with Hank and everyone in the precinct and Connor is such an angel how can ANYONE hate him

I wrote this because I wanted to establish the lore and now I don't know where I'm going with this but sex between a bonded guide and sentinel is basically Kama sutra level out of this world NCMEMCMDMCMDMFMMDMFM

* * *

I wrote this for Hankcon but I ALSO WANNA WRITE THIS FOR ALLEN/60 and like let's just picture Connor, Niles and Silas all fully trained Guides - Amanda was a reknown researcher for Guide studies and even standardised the Guide exam

the highest qualification for a Guide is given after a Guide successfully pulls a Sentinel from a coma induced zone. I'd imagine Connor already passed it, Connor pulled a young lady out from her 2 year coma, and Silas and Niles are on the way of completing theirs

Hank's a washed up Sentinel who really doesn't want to bother with awakening his other senses and can't really imagine having to deal with a permanent Guide living around him

Gavin the rowdy hotshot who's eager to fully awaken but he hasn't settled for a permanent partner because none of them really comfort him well enough out of his zones

Allen the tired SWAT captain who needs his heightened senses and relies on the team Guide to help him out of zones but again, like Gavin, doesn't feel the connection is right but still he works through it because it's what he needs

* * *

I really like the Guide/Sentinel AU over omegaverse because there's so much more to explore and the power balance isn't on one trope - Sentinels are equally likely to abuse their superior strength as are Guides who have the literal ability to tame and coax a Sentinel

Guides are really just like normal humans aside from their empath ability, and even then their empath abilities only work on Sentinels

Sentinels on the other hand have to rely on a guide or sheer willpower to get through the oversensitivity they face with the barrage of taste, scent, sight, sound, touch that can be extremely jarring the first time a sense awakens and its gets worse when each sense "unlocks"

of course the aim is to unlock all your senses and become a full-time sentinel but that requires you having found a guide you're comfortable with, its like trying to find your soulmate essentially. it's not required, but the more affinity the better the guide that do their job

* * *

"Hank," Connor's voice is like a distant rumble, like waves crashing over rocks. "I want you to focus on me." His voice is like honey, syrupy sweetness that curls around Hank in a fogging smoke. "Listen and focus only on my voice. Can I touch you?"

He doesn't know if he's responding, but it must be something positive when he feels hands - soft, very soft - gently cup his face. He's immediately draw to eyes, wide, brown. All encompassing and welcoming, like hot chocolate on during cold winters.

Then he breaths - gasps alive, as if having drowned and just pulled back out from the waters. He releases a breath he wasn't aware he'd been holding, heaving, the hands are patting his back now. Soothing him. "I'm here, you feel me right? I'm here."

"Yeah," Hank adds with a wheezes, finally finding it in his voice to respond as the fog clears over. Connor smiles, showing little dimples. "Welcome back Lieutenant."

* * *

Silas hasn't completed his exams, he's still certified - and damn good at his job - so it doesn't stop him from trying. "Captain Allen," he starts slow, notes the way the man's head doesn't loll - but his eyes do wander, like a lost man having lost focus.

Characteristic of a zone, but a Sentinel left too long in that state would fall into a coma. "Captain Allen I need you to focus on my voice, can you do that?" There's no response, and for awhile Silas is worried, but the slight murmur is all he really needs to know it's safe.

He holds off touching, it was common knowledge it was important to ease a Sentinel out of their zones with minimal exposure to loud senses - he relaxes his voice as he continues speaking. Careful to note the way eyes flicker onto him and then back out, distracted.

"I'm going to give you a cup, can you take it?" Simple method of gauging responsiveness, for awhile the Captain blinks, blearily at the plastic cup before reaching over and gently grasping. "Good, very good. Can you tell me something Captain? Anything."

"How ... how did the mission go?" Silas almost wants to laugh - typical question for the man to ask. He smiles instead, "It went very well. Suspects were apprehended and hostages saved." Allen grunts his response back, gruff, but with the ways his eyes are steadily focusing

Silas knows the man is back. "Shit," Allen curses, pursing his lips. "That was my roughest zone."

"Captain, the gunshot rang with your hearing still dialed up, this is typical."

"Still ... thank you, Silas."

"This is my job."

* * *

I'd imagine Hank comes out of a zone just tired ... dead tired ... wanting nothing more than to curl up and just hope the world dampens itself. Allen comes out immediately trying to focus back on what his original mission was and asking for the outcome.

Gavin is just as tired but he's more shaky, he has less experience with zoning and the entire experience is jarring.


	5. Wedding Planner AU

I had this burning desire to write a Wedding Planner!Connor AU that's super sweet and super cute. Basically Connor is a pretty well known wedding planner - he planned both the weddings for Elijah Kamski and Markus Manfred and the media attention made him pretty sought after.

Silas (Connor -60), his identical twin, runs a bridal salon that people practically fight over to get into his bookings and Niles (RK900), the youngest fraternal twin, bakes these gorgeous cakes and never backs down from a challenge no matter how ridiculous the request sounds.

Anyways Luther and Kara are getting married and they're pretty close to the Manfred's so Simon basically puts in a soft word for Connor to see the couple because they're very sweet and OF COURSE Connor can't say no.

But really he's more distracted by the friend the couple decided to being along as like a third opinion to things because Hank is like those disapproving father-in-law's so Connor has to TURN UP THE CHARM and along the way this gay mess ends up falling like a fool.

And it ends in dirty sex midway the wedding reception. They can't keep it in their pants. This started off soft. I don't know where that came from.


	6. ABO AU

I've always wanted to make an A/B/O fic so here's my super quick blurb of ideas heavily inspired by [@Lino_dbh ](https://twitter.com/Lino_dbh) and that PARTICULAR HANKCON A/B/O ARTWORK THAT HASN'T LEFT MY BRAIN SINCE I SAW IT KSJNFJNKCDNSKJNDDKNKJDKN HELP!!!!!!

Connor comes from an orphanage that basically takes in children with good pedigree and sends them off to families who need a specific secondary gender in their family - meaning if a family needed an alpha to adopt of good pedigree then Kamski's orphanage is the place to go

Amanda acts like the ???? kind of a matron I guess of the place and keeps close watch over the children and Connor and his brothers are probably the best that they've had. Niles (RK900) and Silas (Connor 60) are both solid Alpha's and have been married off into families

Connor remains unpresented but it's the generally assumption of everyone he'd turn out to be an Alpha just like his brothers so when Hank comes along - who lost his entire family, and needing another Alpha to succeed the Anderson name - he adopts Connor without a second thought


	7. Child Android AU

So I was talking to [@moon_bee_](https://twitter.com/moon_bee_) over this and I thought why not share it: basically Connor's design was meant to be on the male Android children but when the children series was scrapped and recalled they decided to "recycle" Connor's design

They aged him up, gave him some things characteristics like his moles and slight wrinkles etc. But in essence his design was meant to go on a child model - and I'd like to think CyberLife has at least one completed version of this child Android Connor lying in stasis

And it's such a surprise when the revolution ends peacefully and the Jericho Android's find him so they call over Connor and Hank who when Connor wakes him up from stasis the poor child just clings to Connor and basically refuses to let go

And it's not like Hank will say to Connor to get rid of him so they adopt the little guy and it's so jarring for Hank because little Connor acts so much like a child - tells them he's cold, he's hungry, has this sweet gentle innocence that breaks Hank's heart

And Hank is reminded so much of Cole and it's not like Hank doesn't have a kind bone in him so he plays the role of father he's been so distant from with Connor there supporting him all the way as they both learn to co parent this little Android kid version of himself


	8. Android Supermodel AU

Dbh au: Android SUPERMODELS can you imagine these quiet, absolutely gorgeous looking Android's that could kill in one glance?? Imagine these Android's after deviation??? Full on sass, snarky comments, haughty laughter and discussion on haute couture????

Some of these previous model Android's getting into design??? Making their own clothes??? Coming up with their own styles????? Making trash bags look good too smh

CyberLife made these Android's all different to each other because that was what the high fashion industry demanded, they couldn't stand mass production of one face on their runways they needed HUGE variety

On one side you could say high maintenance Android but also very well cared for??? The commission for the individuality alone meant these Android's had kind of one-of-a-kind faces and pretty well maintained for the runway???? Hngggggggg


	9. Parent Point AU

I'm still super fucked up about that parent point AU thing so I'm gonna write a dbh AU for it

Summary: adults are given parent points over the course of their life which will then allow them to purchase children, the best children are over 100k parent points

Amanda is a key figure in the government with heavy sway on matters, she's influential with the name and money to back her - she's a single lady and has stayed single for awhile but it doesn't stop the stream of parent points that come in to her account for her exemplary behavior

Eventually she comes to realize her house - mansion, really - is too lonely. She's not getting any younger and she realizes she does want to raise children to continue her legacy, or at least leave something positive in the world before she dies.

She books an appointment and visits the facility, there she gets her palms scanned and the receptionist is pleasantly surprised to see her parent points in the millions - the facility sorts their children according to ability and age so it's no surprise she gets taken to the

prized room. Filled with color, bright ivory and very few children, their laughter and squeals sounding from the room.

"Advanced language skills, superior mathematics and excellent athleticism! All these young doves here are between 200k to 120k but that shouldn't be an issue!"

Her eyes follow the children, she'd been expecting to just go back with one. She's not too picky on looks, and gender but what does catch her eye are boys - triplets, huddled by the side with a book between them. Completely absorbed in conversation with each other and not playing

"What about them?"

The caregiver gives a somewhat sour look.

"Oh they're just the same, it's just they refuse to be separated - threw up a fuss when one of them was about to get adopted. We're moving them down a room because of it."

Amanda considers the words, watches the boys - watches just how hostile they act towards the other kids and even moreso to the caretakers. Watches just how protective the middle sibling seemed to be of his younger brothers, all fiery personalities if she had to guess.

"I'll take them."

"I - I'm sorry?"

"The three boys, I'll take them all. It shouldn't be an issue with my account right?"

"Oh! Of course not ma'am! Please right this way, I'll fix up the papers -"

That day she goes home with three rowdy boys who end up being more trouble than their worth.

She loves them dearly though, and wouldn't trade the world for them 


	10. Fantasy AU

Fantasy AU where Connor is a Hero but he's absolutely fucking tired and exhausted and the weight of expectation is killing him and Hank as the Demon Lord and when Connor goes to slay him Connor just bursts into tears crying because he's so tired so Hank adopts him

and they live and fuck happily ever after in the castle.


	11. 365 AU

Not a fan of k*ty p*rry but she released her mv for 365 and it's giving me strong hankcon au vibes bet on fucking it y'all getting a THREAD

https://youtube.com/watch?v=YrbgUtCfnC0

Hank doesn't think too much about the project, the pay was decent - and it wasn't as if he was being tested on.

He'd been told he was going to spend time with an android - the rumoured first of CyberLife's line. The company having moved from electronics and onto developing robotics (and of course eventually attempting to create an android). 

Hank's a normal guy, average in every way.

He's perfect in that sense. He knows what love is. Married before, divorce now - but it's not as if he has the same bitterness most divorcee's had. They'd separated amicably, and if the test was to measure the androids capability for love then at least he knows he's a fair judge.

He'd been assured it'd be safe - the android would go about it's thing and if anything happened the 24/7 surveillance team would manually override the android to stop and shut down. The contract keeps Hank in mind, so as stipulated - he arrives to the designated location.

There are mirrors he notes - two way, he's been a cop long enough to know. But everything comes across as what any normal suburban couple would have for a home. He feels nervous despite knowing he's not actually meeting a live human.

Connor, that was it's name, greets him at the front door. It's somewhat jarring - all aside from the too-wide eyes and strained smile, Connor does look human. Tuft of carefully styled hair, stray cowlick on the side. Suit pressed on an effortlessly slim figure.

"Welcome home, Hank."

The words make him cringe, the voice choppy more than anything - reminding Hank of those automated machines with the pre recorded voices. It's weird, even more so when Connor goes in for a hug that's entirely too tight.

Not human, Hank reminds himself.


	12. RK Siblings AU

RK siblings are little hellions you can't change my mind

60 the one who comes up with the worse ideas, Connor the one who tries to stop but ends up going along with it and 900 the enabler who makes the idea even worse

* * *

The RK shenanigans are literally all that I live for in this world.

60, coughing up and choking on flower petals:

Connor, worriedly: I thought it was all just stories! Who is it! Tell me now!

60: It ... It's ... It's 900 who dared me to eat flowers for 20 bucks.

* * *

60: I'm gonna shove my whole fist in my mouth

Connor: no don't do it

900: do it

60: BET

* * *

60: our new babysitter sucks, let's knock him out and throw him in the pool

Connor: I mean, I don't like Mr perkins too but this is going too far --

900: replace water with paint

Connor: let's do it

* * *

60: mother says we need to eat our greens, so let's climb a tree and start eating leaves

Connor: let's go

900: I'll bring the Mayo

* * *

60: mother says we can't have a dog, what should we do?

900: steal all the neighborhood dogs

Connor: when did you become the shit idea overlord????

* * *

*60 and Connor, watching 900 write on Gavin's face with permanent marker*

60: average prank, but also traditional and very safe, good move

*60 and Connor, watching 900 get gasoline and begin to douse Gavin*

60: oh my God he's learning but at what cost?????

* * *

60: I'm gonna wrestle the new babysitter

900: move over, I didn't watch all those wwe shows for nothing

Connor: please stop Mr Anderson is actually nice

* * *

*60 and 900, walking in covered black and blue*

60: so we got into a fight with the Philips twins

Connor: why???????

900: daniel said the power rangers was a stupid show to watch then I called his entire existence a stupid show to watch

* * *

Amanda: you know I love you boys ...

Connor: oh my God I can hear the "but"

60: SHE'S SENDING US BACK MOM DOESN'T LOVE US ANYMORE

900: *high pitched wailing sound*

Amanda: ...I was going to say we're going to Disneyland but I'm reconsidering

* * *

[https://youtu.be/kLCid7b5uyY](https://t.co/5JU4UhcrYo?amp=1) This is Amanda @ her boys in Disneyland

* * *

*60 and 900, about to walk out with a few rolls of toilet paper under their arms*

Amanda: where are you boys going?

60: to toilet the neighbors house

Amanda: why?????

900: because he's a racist, homophobic, and angry little rat man

Connor: and you didn't invite me???

* * *

Because I headcanon the rk siblings as terrifyingly intelligent

Amanda: boys, your grades dropped this semester, care to explain?

60: of course! If you line up our cards like this ... As you can see, whether you add our grades diagonally or horizontally - it gets a perfect 69

* * *

60: you promised not to tell!

900: and Hitler promised not to invade Czechoslovakia, welcome to the real world bitch

* * *

900: we need to have a talk about professionalism

60, on the table: brave words coming from someone standing on lava

* * *

60: bitch

900: blocked

60: wait unblock me I have something to say

900: unblocked

60: bitch

* * *

Connor: 60 talks in his sleeps sometimes, it's really cute

60: fight me ... bitch ... square up ...

* * *

60: I dislike people named Connor

Connor: how many Connor's do you know?

60: one.

* * *

Their adoption story is heartbreaking.

TW to murder, blood and gore

Connor, 60 and 900 were kids from a murder case - father, high on drugs, had taken his wife and their three boys and locked them in a shipping container by the docks.

The man proceeded to systematically butcher the wife with a chainsaw, before shooting himself in the head and leaving those three boys sitting in blood 2 inches thick with their parents blood.

They go into foster because there's no living relative willing to claim them.

Foster is hell, they throw a fit if they're not adopted together, and still cause a havoc in homes regardless of how patient parents are. They cycle through 10 different homes before meeting Amanda.

Amanda is different, for starters she's a single parent - but with a huge home.

They don't think much of it, just wider space to mess up.

What does perplex them is when she first scolds them, 60 had gotten crayon all over the wall and she'd made sure to let him know he was getting time out for that behavior.

It's the first time they're punished.

Most houses had treated them like glass, been too affectionate, pegged down their bad behavior as trauma from the incident.

Amanda is different.

She scolds them, chides, encourages - she doesn't put up with bad behavior and is receptive to good.

It takes them a full week before they say anything to her.

Connor is first, he says thank you for the food, and she smiles wide.

The next day she takes them out to the park for ice cream.

It takes awhile for the other two to crack, but they follow their older brother quick.

Within 6 months the house is always filled with noise, laughter and shrieks of delight - and while her little hellions have a bad attitude with strangers there doesn't come a day Amanda regrets signing those adoption forms.


	13. Blacklist AU

BLACKLIST AU BECAUSE IM WEAK FOR THAT POWERFUL RICH BITCH CONNOR SHIT

Hank's a good guy, better cop and decent friend, but overall he's a good guy and about as average as any American.

When the FBI - in swarms - pulls up at his home, some part of him knows he's fucked up.

Agent Manfred, who looks like a kid compared to him, politely requests Hank to follow them quietly - Hank doesn't know how more than a dozen FBI issued cars counts as /quiet/ or anywhere near discreet but at this point he's at no real liberty to question it.

They drive somewhere, to someplace - a blacksite, as Agent Manfred would explain. Hideout, carefully hidden away from public view to a facility Hank gets the feeling he's going to see often.

He hopes Sumo doesn't mind the wait, poor boy gets antsy and hungry quickly.

He meets the Director General, Amanda Stern, amicable but someone Hank knows isn't a lady to cross. She questions him, she answers, she explains the situation, he's more than a little baffled by it all.

They take him to the observation dock, and there - chained down like a rabid animal, with numerous guards surrounding him armed to the teeth - Connor Arkait.

Wanted fugitive of the FBI.

Requesting, having been rather specific, to speak to Hank Anderson only.

"Hello, Hank, finally - we meet."

"I have no idea who you are."

Connor barks a laughter, it's a little out of place. "Of course you wouldn't! Oh but I know plenty about you, Hank. I'm sorry to hear about your wife and child by the way."

Something in Hank snaps.

It's something personal, their deaths, the death of the woman he'd loved and his only child - something held close to heart it's enough to elicit a visceral reaction from him.

"Calm down, Hank, I say it with jest of course - what if I told you they're alive?"

"I don't need to hear the words of a criminal."

"Criminal? Harsh. But really, take a look in the little briefcase I came in with. A cute little folder with your name on it would have reached the lovely director general."

Amanda does pass him the folder, and the pictures inside make his stomach turn - his wife, still beautiful as he remembered her, captured by a photographer.

"My son, I don't see any pictures of him."

"We have him - my family and me that is - oh don't get angry, he's cared for."

* * *

I need to write more about this AU?? 

Basically Connor offers to give back Cole to Hank in return for Hank to help him hunt down the wife - who Hank had divorced previously so he really doesn't hold that much love for especially since she's the one who made up the accident.

Hank's wife basically a dangerous criminal who couldn't leave her past and decided to take Cole with her and fake an accident letting Hank think they were both dead.

Cole who got into Connor's care after Connor managed to brush past her.

Hank who he tracks down to pull in and help find her because there's no better person, in the middle Connor offers up blacklisters - most wanted criminals of the world - to the FBI in return to helping hunt her down.

Connor gets to keep the police and Hank in his pocket hoho.

Silas as his twin, Niles as the hired bodyguard with Expensive plastic surgery to act as a body double when necessary hoho.

Markus as an FBI agent!! God I'm loosing my mind.


	14. HankconRK1760 AU

HANKCONRK1760 THREAD I HAD IN THE SHOWER BECAUSE AHHHH

Elijah Kamski is a reknown geneticist specializing in cloning. He looses his wife and son in an accident and in that grief he attempts to clone them despite how he gets condemned for how unethical the entire practice is.

After numerous failed attempts the last two successful clones are Connor and Silas - mirror images of each other with their own personalities. To Elijah their eyes are wrong - his child had blue - but they're both testaments to his scientific capabilities so he keeps them.

It doesn't help both have photographic memory, and when it becomes apparent they can remember large volumes of data with little to no difficulty he makes them remember all his important data. They become walking databases for his research, and their value increases from that.

The guards they're assigned with go through rigid background checks and fitness tests, it's an agonizing process but the pay is enticing enough despite the numerous possibilities of getting killed protecting these two treasured living experiments.

Hank gets recommend by his former boss, an older man planning to retire to the Bahamas quietly and pushed Hank to take up another bodyguard job because he's /that/ good at what he does despite his age. Guy couldn't leave Hank to struggle to find another job, and Elijah is decent.

Niles hears of the open position completely by accident, fresh out of training and having planned to go into the FBI but with the pay Elijah was offering he'd been tempted - it's solely the fact he looks so similar to the boys he gets hired as a top candidate.

Hank joins as a bodyguard for Connor, Niles for Silas and also acting as a body double when necessary. Most people assume Connor and Silas is just one person going by different names so it makes their jobs somewhat easier. 

The first time they meet the twins, it's jarring.

They're similar, in too many ways than one - their smile, the way they hold themselves, the way they talk, even the clothes they wear carefully selected making them mirror images of one another. 

Only one thing sets them apart - small choker necklaces of baby blue silk.

On the end there's a gem, aquamarine, set over a design that makes for about the only difference between them. 

Connor has the design of a bird. 

Silas a cage. 

They learn from Amanda, the boys caretaker and handler, they have a habit of switching their necklaces.

The first week is hell for the both of them, it should be evident despite the luxuries the twins are afforded in the grand home they're incredibly restless. 

Niles doesn't know if he should feel sorry for them, being a prisoner in your own home is never nice.

They'd been given strict instructions to make sure the twins never left the estate, confined to their space with a cycle of guards, dogs and snipers to watch the outside. Niles doesn't know if it's to keep intruders out or the prisoners in. Hank shares the same sentiment.


	15. Tall Man AU

The Tall Man AU for RK siblings.

TW abuse

Connor's first mother is loving - she has pretty brown hair and sparkling eyes. Their family is small, just the four of them, mom, dad, two brothers - they had a dog once but he'd run away. They couldn't afford to feed him anyway.

They can't really afford to feed themselves too - they go hungry sometimes, dad buys more beer than food. Mom gets angry, dad gets angry and hits her.

But it's okay, because she loves them.

She spends less time hugging them these days, she doesn't say much anymore.

The tall man comes at night.

He's scary, he's big - Connor should've been smarter since he's the oldest but he'd heard something at the edge of the woods and he couldn't help to look.

Of course his brothers follow, they've never been separated - they get through the worst days with each other after all.

The tall man takes them, he bundles them easily - they're small, too small for their ages, so their screams are muffled. Connor doesn't know how all three of them managed to get taken - but they don't put up much of a fuss, they're too scared.

But they have each other.

Their second mother is loving.

She has warm eyes and a soft voice. She reminds them of their first mother - but she's different, she hugs them alot more, shushes them softly when they cry.

There's no angry drunk dad in this house, there's only a mom who gives them warm food and news clothes - endless cuddles and books to fill the shelves.

Connor likes his new mom.

The tall man comes again.

They're less scared this time - they'd seen the tall man a little more often now to know the tall man is also kind. They're sad to leave their second mom, but they promise their new home with have a mom that loves them just as much.

They follow and don't put up much of a fuss.

Their second mom is stern. But not the bad kind, her eyes are sharp but they're not mean - she greets them at the front of her house, big house, bigger than their last. Her smile is wide when she greets them, her braids carefully tied back and white gown a contrast to her skin.

She says her name is Amanda, and she's their mother - they agree because they've had two mother's now. A third can't be any different.

Their new home is prettier than the last two, they have maids and butlers, they have private classes and wear clothes of soft cotton.

There's no dad in this house, but it doesn't bother them.

Amanda doesn't hug much, but she does - she teaches them alot. About life, about the world, about the things they should learn and how lucky they are.

Connor thinks they're pretty lucky.

Their new life is like that, a whirlwind of new clothes and endless food, new toys and days filled with learning and playing until they get too tired to move.

They never go hungry these days.

People ask sometimes - they get curious. Connor thinks it normal since they look nothing like Amanda.

If anyone asks, Connor only smiles - Amanda has been the only mother they've ever known.

But they know better, they've had three - but they like their new mom best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm active [on my Twitter](https://twitter.com/therealconnor60)! (´,,•ω•,,)♡


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